Seattle, always classy

I am not proud of my torrid affair years ago with Brad Pitt. It happened, get over it. Since we do share a history, he reads my blog, I watch his movies and sometimes, late at night, we talk about our children.

I moved from Seattle a few years ago, for a variety of reasons. While the exact move ended up being incredibly stupid, ripped off and living on a farm with sheep and chickens, actually moving from Seattle was brilliant. Don't get me wrong, Seattle is a lovely town, with swell people, lots of bikes, great restaurants and a lot of psychotic losers.

One of the things I will never miss, make that two things, are the whiney liberals who must reach consensus on everything. I swear, nothing will happen in that city until the pot smoking birkenstock wearers gather, debate, discuss, smoke a bong full and decide that more debate must take place. I always felt that what Seattle needed more than anything was a real leader, one elected person who would come in and just railroad some initiatives into place, damn the slow witted hippies and their endless talk.

The other thing, political correctness run amok. Someone once called this strange behavior "Seattle nice" and that may capture the concept, if by nice you mean boring. If you had a strong opinion in the wrong crown in Seattle, you would be sent outside with the smokers to mull over the concept of nice, all by yourself, in the rain and some organic tobacco abusers.

Every now and then, though, someone in Seattle does something that is both ballsy and wrong. One year, on labor day, some adventurous artists put a ball and chain on "Hammering Man" an adequate statue positioned outside of the Seattle Art Museum. Hammering Man came to epitomize the working man, standing tall outside a rather boring building, with his arm moving mechanically 24 hours a day. Well, mostly 24 hours a day. In my time in Seattle Hammering Man, like many a union worker, found injuries and fatigue a decent enough reason to fake an injury and take some time off.

But the picture above is Seattle in all its glory. First, it's very funny, and totally politically incorrect and, this being done in Seattle, was quickly removed, so as not to cause anyone to complain, debate, bitch and moan and call all their lesbian friends for a quick protest over coffee and pizza.

I often think about moving back to the Northwest, but I won't do it. Much like my affair with Brad Pitt, it has been done and I have moved on.