I am an optimist about many things. I do believe the economy will set itself right again, probably without the help from the government, but maybe not. I think people in general are good. I am a strong believer in love, not always at first sight, but that too is nice.
2009 was the end of a cycle for me. In January 2005 all sorts of things started that led to this sort of negative cycle that just seemed to feed upon itself. In the years after some things have played out a couple of times, people close to me rip me off, make promises that were as empty as the air it took to speak them, love came and went and came again, good friends remained, some did not. I lost my mother and some of my brain. A couple of businesses I started ended. I spent a winter of disconnect, wondering how the children and I would survive.
Then things somehow blossomed. Love returned in full bloom, a business that I had to kill because a corrupt bungler was damaging, came back to life, a portfolio of my creative work began to make the rounds, when it seemed impossible to ever imagine owning a house, I bought one for cash.
Work, love, health all seem to be stable and flourishing.
I think I had about as bad of a 2008-09 as many other Americans. Job losses, basic survivability and stepping back and trying to figure out what is important and what is not.
Here, on the official end of 2009 I feel strong and set to move forward. I know there are a lot of people right now wondering what the next step should be, how to survive in turbulent times, what more could go wrong. Sometimes it is easy to get depressed, or stay that way. I am a firm believer in focusing on what works and what you can control. In this economy, jobs are scarce. It can be hard to hold it together, but not impossible.
I hardly ever have advice for people. I do think it is OK to cut the fat from our lives, whether that means fewer meals in restaurants to leaving behind stagnant friendships or dead relationships. It might mean moving. I know, it is supposed to be stressful, but it has hardly ever been that for me.
Oh, I do have advice. Moving can be fun, but sell a lot of your shit before you do it. Last year I was living in this sort of depressed rural area in New York and when we were getting ready to move, we could not hold a garage sale because no one near us had the money to buy much of anything and certainly not the art I would have needed to sell. In the end I am happy I did not sell it, because we have moved into a large house that is perfect for housing art.
But if you must move, sell as much as possible. Really, what do you need in your life? A bed, cooking stuff and some towels. We spend so much time collecting things that are supposed to mean something to us, we get beholden to the stuff and forget the actual memories. Sell it off and start new.
There it is, the mantra of the end of 2009, sell it and start new.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Look up
2010 will be the year of the big turnaround. That's what the experts are saying. Why? A number of reasons, but lets cut to the end, because one thing always trumps economists and experts and it's politics. This is an election year and the democrats have a majority in congress, the senate and some say the White House.
My guess is that the lame and timid "leaders" will pull something out of their hat to make the voters think that they are actual leaders at work. What will it be? More stimulus money? Another vote buying scheme like cashing in clunkers? A new war? The list is indeed endless, but if the dems want to get reelected, they had best do better that then lame healthcare reform and the even lamer new regulations on the financial industry.
In fact, in these leaderless and spineless dems wanted advice from me, and I have yet to get a call, I would tell them to dump Harry Reid and remind him he is about to lose his senate seat. Then I would silence the prancing of Barney Frank, because he is the symbol of everything wrong with congress, all bluster, no content. Sometimes the loudest message is the one no one hears, that is ACT. Do something, spend federal money to develop the largest wind power farm in the world, cover Arizona with solar panels, something that is future leaning that we can all see. FDR was smart, he spent money he did not have to build huge hydroelectric dams, not just because he liked saying hydroelectric, but because it did many things with the same money being spent. It hired people who desperately needed work (familiar?) is supplied necessary energy to people who needed it, it made sense in a chaotic time.
Simple things that offer hope and serve a purpose will always get positive attention. The healthcare debate became controlled by senators who seemed only focused on their own dinner table conversations. Hate abortion? Add it to the bill. Hate yourself, stall and hope the electorate in Connecticut will forget when the next election rolls around. Obama has done nothing better, he is neither the leader he appeared to be, or the wisest man to have slept in the White House. Still, he seems nice enough to get reelected in 2012 as long as the republicans continue to be purchased by the nuttier of the right wing.
There is an election in 2010 and both parties seem unwilling or unable to come up with constructive plans to make this once great nation great again. We spent 8 years spending money we did not have on wars we did not need. Obama seemed to want to change that, but instead he is George Bush with a different skin color and better language skills.
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
So this is xmas
I love the holidays, I always have, always will. I do not believe the hype or advertising that goes along with it, but I do love to hear from distant relatives, old friends, have my children handy, great meats, home made treats and singing carols.
Actually we are not a singing family.
We also do not celebrate the consumer version of christmas. I never got it, although as a young child I did get presents and like many other families, it almost always was awkward and sad. It always seemed to me that the gift giving thing was the sure way to let someone know you really don't know them, or you really don't care. Either way, when it happens to you, it hurts.
I stopped that nonsense a long time ago. Presents are reserved for family and people I love. If you are reading this, and you expected something and it did not come, get the message.
On the other hand, I did not get many cards this year and the few I got were from people I like, admire or love, and sometimes all three. What is great is that after a few years of moving and changing jobs and having a life seemingly in flux, we are grounded and healthy and happy. What is even better is that for the first time in many years, we had peace and happiness during the holidays. Last winter, after a business partner ripped me off and left me hanging both professionally and financially, and the holidays were mired in uncertainty and lack of money, this year we have a home, a lesbian dog and some real love.
The holidays have a way of depressing some people, but not us. Even last year, with no gifts and barely a meal on the table and the heat in the house set at 60 because we could not afford the oil to waste, we had a blast. Snow brings out the child in everyone, so we played.
In fact, last year may have been the best of holiday seasons because the effort was more on being a family and sharing moments than it was on wrapping paper and getting meaningless gifts. In my life I have watched the complete commercialization of the holiday season and the lemmings that make up most of this country can not wait to get out and buy plastic crap made in China and give it to people who really could care less.
In that respect, thank the lord sweet jesus for a simple holiday.
Actually we are not a singing family.
We also do not celebrate the consumer version of christmas. I never got it, although as a young child I did get presents and like many other families, it almost always was awkward and sad. It always seemed to me that the gift giving thing was the sure way to let someone know you really don't know them, or you really don't care. Either way, when it happens to you, it hurts.
I stopped that nonsense a long time ago. Presents are reserved for family and people I love. If you are reading this, and you expected something and it did not come, get the message.
On the other hand, I did not get many cards this year and the few I got were from people I like, admire or love, and sometimes all three. What is great is that after a few years of moving and changing jobs and having a life seemingly in flux, we are grounded and healthy and happy. What is even better is that for the first time in many years, we had peace and happiness during the holidays. Last winter, after a business partner ripped me off and left me hanging both professionally and financially, and the holidays were mired in uncertainty and lack of money, this year we have a home, a lesbian dog and some real love.
The holidays have a way of depressing some people, but not us. Even last year, with no gifts and barely a meal on the table and the heat in the house set at 60 because we could not afford the oil to waste, we had a blast. Snow brings out the child in everyone, so we played.
In fact, last year may have been the best of holiday seasons because the effort was more on being a family and sharing moments than it was on wrapping paper and getting meaningless gifts. In my life I have watched the complete commercialization of the holiday season and the lemmings that make up most of this country can not wait to get out and buy plastic crap made in China and give it to people who really could care less.
In that respect, thank the lord sweet jesus for a simple holiday.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Blame the boomers
Everything that is wrong in the world can be blamed on the idiocy, immaturity and lack of a moral compass of the baby boomer generation. It's true and if you give it just a little thought, you will see it is an absolute.
This is a generation that has led a demographic tracking like no other. As babies, their parents discovered the disposable diaper, making having lots of babies easy and filling landfills for a trillion years. As they grew they became the dangerous sheep that would burn the earth, create billions in fake wealth and demand more and more government kickbacks all the while demanding lower taxes. These idiots never had to grow up and to this day they refuse to even give it a second thought.
This is a generation that has purchased the most gas guzzling vehicles imaginable. This is a generation that grew up reading the warning on cigarette packages and continued to smoke. This is a group of people who followed hippies, looking for love and leaders and once that flawed flock failed, they quickly ran to the likes of daddy figures like Ronald Reagan to give them answers, allow them to continue to violate all sorts of rules of nature and feel safe in their McMansions.
This is a generation that uses plastic surgery and other sorcery to try and remain young and vibrant. They have no shame in either attire or style. They are a sad and vicious group of under achievers who sadly believe their own press. They may be the offspring of the greatest generation, but they have proven time and again to be users and useless.
This is a generation that rules the government like no other. For many years their retarded voting habits have made a mockery of the democratic system. One year they vote in a gaggle of right wing nutballs, the next, an equal number of looney left wing crazies. You want to know why the government has not really accomplished anything of substance since 1965? Blame the boomers. You want to know why the current healthcare debate will fail miserably? It is the insane rantings and neediness of these aging losers. They all want medicare, they just detest the idea of paying for it, which has been their leit motif since day one. This is a generation that has been given everything and has produced nothing.
I had an idea many years ago and it is an even more important concept now. If we really want a just society, we must allow parents of children under the age of 18 to have a vote for every one of those children. At 18 you can vote for yourself and even form a lobbying group to get your ideas heard. Before that you are nothing. But those over 18, especially the greedy and misguided boomers have always had a voice and have forever taken advantage of it. It is way past time to tell them to shut up. Their dangerous neediness will bankrupt the country and probably ruin the environment for everyone who survives them famine inducing ways. The only way to get balance is to take away their screaming voices and allow younger generations who still hope to have a future to shit these idiots out.
A vote for any child under 18 would drastically change the focus of the government. A whole series of policy decisions would focus not just on the environment, but on healthcare for everyone, not just the aged. It is insane that there is a program that offers free or low cost care for the people who are so close to death, but deny it to the workers, the youngsters and the people who will be paying the debts of the deadbeat boomers forever.
You take away the boomer ability to get the ear of congress, you will change the way this country is focused. I am not suggesting that boomers not be allowed to vote, although judging from the haphazard and uneducated way to already vote it would not be a bad idea, I am just suggesting that new voices and the voices of the future should have more weight, or some weight.
The boomer generation has done just about everything to fuck up this country and for the most part they have succeeded. It is time to shut them down or at least shut them out.
This is a generation that has led a demographic tracking like no other. As babies, their parents discovered the disposable diaper, making having lots of babies easy and filling landfills for a trillion years. As they grew they became the dangerous sheep that would burn the earth, create billions in fake wealth and demand more and more government kickbacks all the while demanding lower taxes. These idiots never had to grow up and to this day they refuse to even give it a second thought.
This is a generation that has purchased the most gas guzzling vehicles imaginable. This is a generation that grew up reading the warning on cigarette packages and continued to smoke. This is a group of people who followed hippies, looking for love and leaders and once that flawed flock failed, they quickly ran to the likes of daddy figures like Ronald Reagan to give them answers, allow them to continue to violate all sorts of rules of nature and feel safe in their McMansions.
This is a generation that uses plastic surgery and other sorcery to try and remain young and vibrant. They have no shame in either attire or style. They are a sad and vicious group of under achievers who sadly believe their own press. They may be the offspring of the greatest generation, but they have proven time and again to be users and useless.
This is a generation that rules the government like no other. For many years their retarded voting habits have made a mockery of the democratic system. One year they vote in a gaggle of right wing nutballs, the next, an equal number of looney left wing crazies. You want to know why the government has not really accomplished anything of substance since 1965? Blame the boomers. You want to know why the current healthcare debate will fail miserably? It is the insane rantings and neediness of these aging losers. They all want medicare, they just detest the idea of paying for it, which has been their leit motif since day one. This is a generation that has been given everything and has produced nothing.
I had an idea many years ago and it is an even more important concept now. If we really want a just society, we must allow parents of children under the age of 18 to have a vote for every one of those children. At 18 you can vote for yourself and even form a lobbying group to get your ideas heard. Before that you are nothing. But those over 18, especially the greedy and misguided boomers have always had a voice and have forever taken advantage of it. It is way past time to tell them to shut up. Their dangerous neediness will bankrupt the country and probably ruin the environment for everyone who survives them famine inducing ways. The only way to get balance is to take away their screaming voices and allow younger generations who still hope to have a future to shit these idiots out.
A vote for any child under 18 would drastically change the focus of the government. A whole series of policy decisions would focus not just on the environment, but on healthcare for everyone, not just the aged. It is insane that there is a program that offers free or low cost care for the people who are so close to death, but deny it to the workers, the youngsters and the people who will be paying the debts of the deadbeat boomers forever.
You take away the boomer ability to get the ear of congress, you will change the way this country is focused. I am not suggesting that boomers not be allowed to vote, although judging from the haphazard and uneducated way to already vote it would not be a bad idea, I am just suggesting that new voices and the voices of the future should have more weight, or some weight.
The boomer generation has done just about everything to fuck up this country and for the most part they have succeeded. It is time to shut them down or at least shut them out.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
All politics is funny
These past few months have been fun and funny. The republicans have done everything possible to appear to be suicidal. No matter what the issue in congress has been, the republicans only response has been no. Strange, because at some point you run for reelection and to imagine the voters are just not paying any attention is blind, at the best.
Plus, you add in the whacky tea baggers, all republicans from the wardrobe, and you have a large percentage of these tea baggers who want insane conservative values implemented. The concept of a party already in the minority at war with itself is almost too hard to believe. Then again, it looks like the democrats are just as stupid.
The dems have a majority in both houses and own the White House. Their agenda should be flying through. Instead, with social retards like Joe Lieberman and conservative democrats from the backwoods south screwing everything up, they appear to be a party about to also implode. How interesting. Both parties seem unable to lead or even to define what it is they really want to accomplish.
Fantastic.
People often seem to elect a congress of one party and a president of another, causing a balance of sorts. Reagan got democrats, Clinton got blow jobs, and a republican congress, Bush.2 got mostly a republican congress that did basically anything he wanted and still his party of the unborn could not bring itself to pass anti-abortion legislation. Now, Obama has both houses and I can not think of a single major accomplishment from this group of leaderless egomaniacs has accomplished. Ho hum.
The democratic party is starting to fray as well. With Senator Lieberman all but ruining any chance of substantial healthcare reform, the liberals of the party are pissed and want blood, which the professional hacks in the senate seem unable to show passion for anything. It's would be a funny game, if it were not about the countries long term health, the ending of useless wars and some changes that would allow sick people to see doctors in one of the richest countries in the world.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Buying a new car
Sure, it's kind of offensive, but also super funny, which always wins out in my opinion.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Whip saw economics
I am about done re-editing the feature film I have been working on regarding the troubled economy. One of the people I interviewed for the film was a business writer at Time Magazine, Justin Fox. We spoke in his office and it was right in the midst of the banking troubles and stinking stock market. He is a bright guy, and funny too.
He has a column out today on the Time site, here, that I find, well, strange. He of all people seemed to be clued in that what America really needs right now is some major change, both in regulation and the leadership of the financial industry that got the country into this mess. Instead, many of the old guard remain in their beautiful offices in New York City, doing exactly the same idiotic investing strategies that almost led to the worst economic crisis since the depression.
What does Prancing Barney Frank and his slow witted brethren in Congress plan to do about this? Nothing. Frank, the godmother of the regulatory sissies, talks a good game, but when it comes to action, he is more a watch and see and wait and watch and do nothing but talk kind of fella.
The economy remains sketchy, at best, and all the "leaders" in congress and on Wall Street are too mystified or purchased to bring about any serious change. When morons like Sarah Palin screech about the country falling into the sewer, they should clarify what they mean by pointing to congressional do nothings like Frank and Pelosi and the entire bought off Republican party and cry a river over those meandering mouth pieces of monopolies.
He has a column out today on the Time site, here, that I find, well, strange. He of all people seemed to be clued in that what America really needs right now is some major change, both in regulation and the leadership of the financial industry that got the country into this mess. Instead, many of the old guard remain in their beautiful offices in New York City, doing exactly the same idiotic investing strategies that almost led to the worst economic crisis since the depression.
What does Prancing Barney Frank and his slow witted brethren in Congress plan to do about this? Nothing. Frank, the godmother of the regulatory sissies, talks a good game, but when it comes to action, he is more a watch and see and wait and watch and do nothing but talk kind of fella.
The economy remains sketchy, at best, and all the "leaders" in congress and on Wall Street are too mystified or purchased to bring about any serious change. When morons like Sarah Palin screech about the country falling into the sewer, they should clarify what they mean by pointing to congressional do nothings like Frank and Pelosi and the entire bought off Republican party and cry a river over those meandering mouth pieces of monopolies.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Great news, right?
It's kind of amazing when a country is desperate for good/happy news and will take anything to see it.
Trimmed the fewest jobs? Only lost 11 thousand jobs.
If I could drink I would be downing champagne right now.
NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) — The long-suffering U.S. jobs market improved significantly in November, as employers trimmed the fewest jobs of any month since the start of the recession, and the unemployment rate posted the biggest one-month decline in more than three years.
U.S. payrolls slipped 11,000 jobs in the month, far below any of the job losses posted over the last 23 months. Economists surveyed by Briefing.com had forecast a loss of 125,000 jobs in November.
Disease of choice
I am all for equal rights, heck I even think the gays should enjoy the thrill ride that is marriage. I also think that a flourishing society should correct it's historical checkered past, in part by helping people less fortunate find a career, a sense of self, and on and on.
What I don't always like is when some group wants to claim special status because of a self inflicted issue. Lets take fatties as an example. We live in the most obese country in this history of the world. Let that sink in. How does one become obese? Eat too much, or more calories than you burn, something like that.
You choose to eat too much. Or, if you are one of the very few with a glandular problem, you seek help once you understand that eating too much will fuck up your glands and help you to become a big giant balloon figure.
What happens when people decide, for whatever reason, to eat way too much and never exercise? They become a lobbying force. They want larger wheel chairs, and special access and then they want to pay as much for, say a seat on a plane, but take up more than the average person is taking up. Thus the picture.
I think freedom means people get to make all sorts of bad choices, gay marriage, drunk in public, having sex with Sarah Palin by accident (I swear). Taking advantage of freedom also has consequences. You want to dine at the fast food buffet and never walk, that's fine. But if you look like a Macy's parade figure, the least you can do is pay for an extra seat on a tiny plane.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
If you don't stand for something
Oh god, and I do not mean that god, I mean once again the shopping season and buying crap for people you may not really like very much, is being ruined by the religious nutjobs who want everyone to be like them, lemmings and hypocrites.
Why take this website as an example.
Yikes I say. They review stories for the Christmassy attitude? Their love of Jeeezuuus? Huh? Do these religious crazies really not know that everyone loves christmas because we get toys and other shit? I mean, really?
Look what they say about Borders. First, Borders is a terrible store for a variety of reasons, low pay for workers, boring choices and lack of originality and just the box support of bad architecture, but for not respecting the holiday? Anyway, here is what the sheep say about Borders:
I tried to find a children's book about the birth of Christ and could not find any. They had a Christmas display table but it was all about santa!
We had a group from our church who gathered to go Christmas caroling and were invited in to a Pittsburgh PA Borders. When we arived, they told us that they were pleased that we were there to entertain thier customers, but that we could not sing any religious songs. I no longer shop Borders. I also believe that our responsability goes beyond not shopping. We should be writing individual letters to the corporate management to state that until policies change, they have lost our business.
I am slightly offended by Border's lack of incorporation of Christmas in their ad's. I am a member of the Border's Rewards Club but will not be shopping at Borders this Christmas and upcoming year unless a public outreach and apology is issued to all Christians and believers of Christmas.
I find it offensive that this store is so eager to have our money but neglects to honor the holiday. I won't shop here and as much as possible shop in Christian book stores. Borders has an agenda and it is nothing to do with Christian values.
We saw "Holiday" trees, "Holiday" this & "Holiday that, but the ONLY mention of "Christmas" was on 2 of their gift cards. Very disappointing!
More Bibles!
These people make me kind of sick and kind of envious. Maybe if they could remove their robes for a minute, they could imagine if instead of a magic man in the sky they were Jews, they would see all the happy holiday crap as an insult for a variety of other reasons.
Or Muslim. Imagine the whole xmas crap from the eyes of someone other than your own god.
In our capitalistic society, why not just admit the someone other than a child molesting priest is using religious holidays to make money?
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
NO on gay marriage
So, the democratically controlled senator in New York could not bring themselves to hold their noses long enough to pass a law allowing the gays to marry. Again, all I will say is if you will not allow the gays to marry, the least you can do is remove the perks that straight people get from getting married. Fair is fair.
I was married for 10 years to a woman. For a while is was OK, for a while it was hell, most of the time it just was. Would I want to get married again, well, I plan to get married in about 11 months, so that will answer that question. The problem with prejudice is that there is always the other shoe. Plus, the majority of Americans can not even read, much less eat properly. So stupid fat people are beginning to demand their weird rights.
You want a simple answer to this issue? Don't allow anyone to get married, unless it's some special religious ceremony. Anyone else can get some sort of government license, gay, straight in between, and get the perks, the tax breaks, the automatic inheritance, the insurance coverage. Call if flem or anything, but do not call it marriage, that word will be reserve for the religious ceremony which, much like today, will mean nothing. Don't believe me? Ask Tiger Woods.
Jesus Christ
So I was at a job today, setting up my super video camera and this woman begins to chat with me. Almost immediately she tells me that she hopes the traffic won't be so bad today, she had to drive across the city to attend a funeral. Quickly she told me about a woman who at 28 was a mother of two young children, married to a swell guy, diagnosed with brain cancer a month ago and now dead.
It turns out the woman telling me this unfortunate story was deeply religious, or is, deeply religious. She told me that god had more important things for her to do, so he called her home. First, I immediately thought how happy I am that I screen my calls, because if god wants to call me, he will have to leave a message. Then I thought about the children.
Now I know its fashionable to always bring up the children when seeking sympathy or money, but in this case I felt bad for the young children growing up without a mother. Now, my children basically grew up without a mother, but they had me, and I spent way too much time with them, parks, games, crayons, school - I was there. This mother, called to Jesus too early, has left behind two young children and a husband who probably has no clue on raising babies and dating. Lucky for him he belongs to a church, I learned that from the woman sharing too much information.
I am not sure when it's a good time for a parent to die, but I am guessing that kids under the age of 13 are too young to have to deal with the pain and loss. If there is a god who calls people to his palace I really have to wonder what sort of motivations he has. Children change peoples lives, at least the ones open to the change, and to remove a parent from a small child seems like the opposite of what god would be doing.
There are many things in life I just don't get, one is falling prey to the allure of an unknown super powerful all forgiving god thing, hanging out somewhere in the pretty sky, doing all sorts of nice things and sometimes taking people home with him to share tea and stories with. I life fantasy as much as most people, maybe more than most people, but the who god business just seems to stupid to me. When people talk about their god taking someone home, it makes me think of how god should act. You know the crazy idiot who killed four police officers in Seattle this past week? Why didn't god call that loser home a few weeks ago, before he started raping children and killing innocent police? No, god was too busy making sure the brain cancer would kill the mother of two babies.
It turns out the woman telling me this unfortunate story was deeply religious, or is, deeply religious. She told me that god had more important things for her to do, so he called her home. First, I immediately thought how happy I am that I screen my calls, because if god wants to call me, he will have to leave a message. Then I thought about the children.
Now I know its fashionable to always bring up the children when seeking sympathy or money, but in this case I felt bad for the young children growing up without a mother. Now, my children basically grew up without a mother, but they had me, and I spent way too much time with them, parks, games, crayons, school - I was there. This mother, called to Jesus too early, has left behind two young children and a husband who probably has no clue on raising babies and dating. Lucky for him he belongs to a church, I learned that from the woman sharing too much information.
I am not sure when it's a good time for a parent to die, but I am guessing that kids under the age of 13 are too young to have to deal with the pain and loss. If there is a god who calls people to his palace I really have to wonder what sort of motivations he has. Children change peoples lives, at least the ones open to the change, and to remove a parent from a small child seems like the opposite of what god would be doing.
There are many things in life I just don't get, one is falling prey to the allure of an unknown super powerful all forgiving god thing, hanging out somewhere in the pretty sky, doing all sorts of nice things and sometimes taking people home with him to share tea and stories with. I life fantasy as much as most people, maybe more than most people, but the who god business just seems to stupid to me. When people talk about their god taking someone home, it makes me think of how god should act. You know the crazy idiot who killed four police officers in Seattle this past week? Why didn't god call that loser home a few weeks ago, before he started raping children and killing innocent police? No, god was too busy making sure the brain cancer would kill the mother of two babies.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
The truth about honesty
I got a call from a fairly old friend who has not really spoken to me in over 12 months. He said that he and his wife may lose their home. She was laid off about 4 months ago, he just recently saw a severe cutback in hours and everything is tight. According to him, he is less than a paycheck away from falling behind on both mortgage payments and credit card payments.
He vented. When I began to offer some advice, like the wife taking any job to bring in some much needed money, he got kind of sketchy and had to go.
12 months and not a word. Then drama on that first phone call after a gulf of silence. Drama that seemed mostly self inflicted. See, one of the things I would have said was that when the wife lost her job, they would have been smart to stop all sorts of spending right there and cut expenses and she should immediately look for any work and take whatever came, and they should belt tighten like never before. I may have also told him that now is the time for all good artist types to accept money at every opportunity and not be choosey.
But instead I said something about his wife needing to help, and he was gone. I am not sure why he called. Even now, when I use the term friend for him, I think I am being stupid. He is not a friend. When I recently had a medical emergency, he was not an option for someone who should be called to watch the kids. A few years ago when tragedy in another form came for an extended stay, he was never informed. I did not call when I got ripped off by my business partner, nor for any other financial drama, and I have had a few. So now I am kind of steamed. Was he just going through his phone book, looking for sympathy and possible a loan?
There are often times in our lives when it is right to look at what makes a friend and define those qualities and then hold that defined term up agains tour list of friends and associates. Sorry my phone calling friend, but not only are you not really a friend, you would be well advised to keep you skidding drama to yourself. Or grow the balls to be honest and call your "friends" gently explain your financial health and beg for money. Otherwise you just come across as a user.
He vented. When I began to offer some advice, like the wife taking any job to bring in some much needed money, he got kind of sketchy and had to go.
12 months and not a word. Then drama on that first phone call after a gulf of silence. Drama that seemed mostly self inflicted. See, one of the things I would have said was that when the wife lost her job, they would have been smart to stop all sorts of spending right there and cut expenses and she should immediately look for any work and take whatever came, and they should belt tighten like never before. I may have also told him that now is the time for all good artist types to accept money at every opportunity and not be choosey.
But instead I said something about his wife needing to help, and he was gone. I am not sure why he called. Even now, when I use the term friend for him, I think I am being stupid. He is not a friend. When I recently had a medical emergency, he was not an option for someone who should be called to watch the kids. A few years ago when tragedy in another form came for an extended stay, he was never informed. I did not call when I got ripped off by my business partner, nor for any other financial drama, and I have had a few. So now I am kind of steamed. Was he just going through his phone book, looking for sympathy and possible a loan?
There are often times in our lives when it is right to look at what makes a friend and define those qualities and then hold that defined term up agains tour list of friends and associates. Sorry my phone calling friend, but not only are you not really a friend, you would be well advised to keep you skidding drama to yourself. Or grow the balls to be honest and call your "friends" gently explain your financial health and beg for money. Otherwise you just come across as a user.
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