If you were more like me

I recently was lucky enough to have well over 35 gallons of my blood removed from my body, "all for testing" is what the young Dr. Frankenstein said as he wheeled the barrel of blood out of the back of his truck. That should have been the first clue that this might not be a legitimate clinic, seeing patients in the back of a Ford 150 is probably not up to most medical standards.

All that said, I did sign up for a service that sends me an email to tell me I can log in and find out the various results from the gallons of blood that did make it past the good doctors dinner table and into some foreign blood testing facility in Bulgaria. The nice thing about Bulgarian blood testing centers is that 9 times out of ten, part of each test contains a positive notation for Borsht.

Now, if you read this blog at all, you have probably figured out that I am a complete boob. I am about 3 IQ points higher than a donut, and not a fancy donut either. So imagine the joy when I get an email alert telling me there is some sort of medical test data that I can log in and review.

If you are like me, and thank the good lord sweet Jesus you are not, but if you were, you would log in and pretend to know what you were reading. So far, what I know is I might be pregnant.

Modern medicine.

I do have an appointment in three months to see my doctor, and I am sure that at that point the good Dr. Frankenstein will need a bit more blood to fill his habit, I mean run more tests.