Another Fiat post

As anyone who reads every single letter on this blog, you know as well as I do that it is my responsibility to kiss ass to the powers that be at FIAT to get me one of the new 500 cars.

Sure, I tried this same stunt with the Google laptop, which by the way fell flat, both my attempts to get a test laptop and Googles attempts to reinvent the wheel. So to Google, I say, next time, score me one and I will pimp that shit.

Now, Fiat executives, you may be wondering about the power of this blog. Well, fear not, the vast majority of the people who read this blog found it by searching for "big breasted Italian women." It's true, I get reports.

So, imagine, all those slobs googling Big Breast Italian Women and finding this fascinating blog, which contains nothing about big breast, italian women or much of anything else, if you know what I mean. What it does contain is thousands of hits, maybe millions by the time I find a way to get Fiat's attention, and those people, the breast searchers and the lonely, the depressed and the people not working at work, all those people will someday wonder why they do not have a new Fiat 500. You know why? Because I am going to mention it, post pictures, describe in painful detail and brag about my new Fiat 500. Why? Because you, dear corporate hooligan, plan to give me one for, let's just say 2 years.

Dear readers,
Please go to the Fiat site and sign up for whatever they want you to sign up for. A test drive would be nice, as is the Fiat 500 watch, I know this because I have been bribed with a Fiat 500 watch and sometimes, twice a day or so, it is accurate. While at the Fiat 500 site, you go ahead and try to figure out when the American release date is, because for the life of me, I have no clue.

Dear Fiat executives,
I will do what it takes to get the readers of this blog to feign interest in your car, on that, my promise is indeed secure. In fact, if you send me a car and promise another for a reader, I will even run some contest, again, my promise is sacred.
I will be waiting patiently on my porch, until that big giant FIAT truck pulls up and some zesty Italian delivery man asks for my help removing my car from his truck. Thank you in advance Fiat. You people really are just swell.