Guest blog

I am beyond sick right now, so I am handing this blog over to someone who really knows how to write. Plus, some commentator asked for this. See people, if you ask, you get. Seriously.

One of your nice commentors on your overconsumed blog asked me to write a guest blog. Here's basically what I interpret your thought process, although I don't have nearly as much access to those fun psychedelic drugs that I suspect play a major role in your creativity/brilliance.


The other day, one of the fruit of my loins asked me to allow them to go out to a party with their friends. When I replied rather mysteriously "who are you?" they grew quite upset.
"oh come on dad, weren't you ever a teenager?"
After beating them thoroughly for not addressing me with the appropriate "your royal highness", I retired to my ikea-strewn chamber of solitude to contemplate.
Had I ever been a teenager? Was there a time in my life where there had been more than sexually distraught pets and Beckys? I vaguely remembered a few Lindas, but those might have been dreams. I often dream of Linda.
My childhood is the sort that required massive consumption of narcotics in college in an attempt to forget. Bad haircuts, funny pants, and good music Is what google has revealed from that decade. And who wants to argue with google?
Anyway, the moral of the story and the answer to the question, is of course, I forget the question and have no morals. Next please.

Sent from my iPhone