On being Becky

Oh, not only do I get email, I get postings on my Facebook page.

Speaking of facebook, no wait, here is a letter I received recently.

Matt
How can I become one of your Beckys? Yes, I read your blog, and yes, sometimes it is funny and sometimes, not so much. Lately there were some posts about Becky and I want to be one of your Beckys. I am not sure what the honorific will mean on my resume, but judging by the way you write about all the other Beckys in your life, I think I would be a good Becky.
A little about me...

And there you have it, proof positive that if you lay it out there on the internet of love, what you will get back is at least another Becky.

So, how does one become a Becky? This is an interesting question, because all the Beckys in my life, my lord I may be about to join Charlie Sheen on the insane drugged and winning tour, but to become a Becky, you need to be a Becky. Do you laugh at stupid jokes? Do you make stupid jokes? Like cheap Mexican food? Rate movies by their ability to make you laugh? (Shindlers List, not funny - The Hangover, funny). Do you ride a bike or know someone who does? Artistic? Sexy? Complicated? Smart, possibly super smart? On and on, the list could be endless, but that's good enough.

Now, Being a Becky is a lot like being Native American. Here is how it works. For many years now when I fill out a legal form of any sort and it asks what my ethnicity is I always put either Alaska Native, or American Indian. Why? Well, for the most part, who knows these things? And also, because no one ever says, seriously?

So, if you want to be a Becky, you probably already are a Becky.

Just so you know, being a Becky is super fun. We have parties. We have beach parties. We have bike riding parties. Fajita parties. Sometimes all on the same day. There is a great responsibility in being a Becky, it is not all about games and social events. Part of it is answering the phone.

So, send in those applications. If you send me a naked picture of a video of you naked, possibly with someone else, doing things that even I would be shocked at, well, I will thank you, but you will not be a Becky. Not a single Becky would find that appealing, and being judged by other Beckys is part of the process, or maybe not. It's a mystery how this all works.